Everything Else (And this week's Extra Evil)

Today’s Fortune: A moderate victory is ahead of you.

My perfect book, Everything Abridged, claims to define everything. But it turns out I missed exactly ten things.

You'll have to pick up the slack. Every Wednesday, for the next ten weeks, I'm posting one of the only ten words I missed.

You can win a copy of the new, expanded Everything Abridged paperback, if you write my favorite definition.

Comment your entry on any contest post. My website, Instagram, Substack, Twitter, whatever. The deadline's the following Wednesday, at 4 AM. I don't sleep much.

The first word is "contest."

The conqueror’s prize.

TLDR: Write a funny definition for “contest,” you might win a book. On to your regularly scheduled newsletter.

Extra Evil - Pub Day Hangover

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Newsreel

America spied on its allies. And enemies. And nuetral parties. And you.

AI panic is hiding under your bed.

Ozempic now has more competitors than vowels.

In a romantic twist, the First Lady is also a gaffe machine.

Roy Wood inched ahead in the War of the Swivel Chairs.

Drugs predate words for drugs.

Today's Mood

War Journal

Here’s a cautionary tale on letting pop culture into your brain. I used a spin on Fat Albert’s “Hey, hey, hey” catchphrase for two decades. Then sex crimes changed the context a bit. Every now and then the first two heys slip out, and a keen listener will sniff the air, smelling an infraction, but not knowing the source.

I may need shock therapy. Or empathy for older people behind the times. Mostly voltage.

I got the semifinal round of Cult-Ish posters up. I had a lot of fun writing this one, but the execution is a real HP to MP endeavor. I consider that my specialty, but my doctor isn’t fond of it. And my sister thinks I’m going to melt.

I wouldn’t worry about that. An officer’s definitely going to get me first. I may prewrite something for that. In a sense, it’s the best stunt so far.

I probably should’ve started Succession before it had a Rosebud spoiler, eh? Ah well.

The Present

My steep mental decline lead to this.

Some new New Yorker business on a universal loss.

It’s time to get off the slide, and into the workforce.

You need more Expensive Evil in your life.

Read Everything Abridged to fix the timeline.

The Past

I still think about this old McSweeney’s bit sometimes. More for what it meant than the content.

The Future

Get ready for some enthusiastic heresy.

One fancy magazine bit in the pipleline.

Next Expensive Evil soon. I just have to get a nice two hours of shuteye.

One Sentence Reviews

Fleshgod Apocalypse - Veleno: I think I just like noise. (4/5)

Traveler - Traveler: Never quite takes off. (2.5/5)

Big Jay Oakerson - Dog Belly: Something great and something inane stapled together, alike in dignity. (3/5)

Open Question

Signing off

Thanks for reading Extra Evil, the newsletter looking to the future. Share it to fixate on the past.

-DD