Extra Evil - Written Backwards

Today’s Fortune: .tib eht ot timmoC

Newsreel

Inflation hit the nuclear bunker market.

I’m skipping primary news until one of them drops a hard r.

The White House compromised between anti-migrant and anti-migrant positions.

The Times had its annual civil war.

The only president I don’t have a premade joke for entered hospice.

You can now get vertigo with Sony instead of Meta.

Today's Mood

(I’m fine, I just get an instant laugh from Shinji snapping.)

War Journal

One sad thing about my precise age is never getting to bitch about pop music. It’s better. I can turn on a radio without punching it. I’ll never know the joy of saying “that’s not real music.”

I’ve been to six publishing parties in my life. One featured a naked poet screaming about her father over a short loop of sheet metal scraping together. The others were disappointments.

Maybe I should get out more. But I need time to actually write. And edit. And do the non-writing things that make me worth reading. Though perhaps that poet puts the lie to that. She’s more interesting than anything I’ve done this year. Anything legal, at least.

For a few weeks, this was the “Dennard hates his spine” newsletter. Fun times! I switched back to jokes by popular demand.

My follow-up visits are done, and it looks like spine drama’s left me behind. You really do lose all your friends in your thirties.

You might ask “are you going to stop jumping off things?” Be serious. I have an image to maintain. Reporters never profiled me for my quiet stability.

I’m told my Mom would be proud, but she was a better parent than that. She’d have whipped me into finishing this manuscript months ago.

The Present

I slipped a parody of “Leaving New York” editorials into the New Yorker.

Virtuosity rode again. Shoutout to

Amran Gowani

and

Michael Estrin

.

"Only the Good" is my best free writing. Flat out.

1-900-HOTDOG is the only place this article is possible.

Read my book Everything Abridged to find your center.

The Past

Another shooting, another plug of this article.

The Future

I’m going to eat my body weight in yogurt bars.

The manuscript is officially in the cleaning phase. Bizarre moment.

My next New Yorker bit is saner and crazier at once.

The Everything Abridged paperback will cleanse the wicked.

One Sentence Reviews

Little Hercules: Bad films make you stronger. (0/5)

Refuge: So okay it’s alright. (2.5/5)

All Your Racial Problems Will Soon End: As interesting as a study of the author over time as a collection. (4/5)

Marc Maron: From Bleak to Dark: Great comedy makes you stronger. (5/5)

Open Question

Signing off

Thanks for reading Extra Evil, the newsletter taking attendance. Share it to cut class.

-DD