Extra Evil

Extra Evil - Advanced Socialization

Today's Fortune: You don't have time to be busy.

Dennard Dayle

28 May 2025 — 5 min read

Newsreel

We cut all the vowels from Medicare.

Radical cleric Ehud Olmert slandered the Israeli army.

Harvard and Columbia proved bottomless money pits aren't monoliths.

Princeton quietly dug its bottomless money pit deeper.

It's not too late for Weiner to snipe Cuomo.

Meta bets replacing your friends is easier than reaching them.

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A Photo

I'm always struck by how skilled some people are at enjoying life.

War Journal

Overheard on Planet Coffee:

Bandana: I spent five years learning my own body. Starting, you know, in 2020. But my calling. It was a long road, and now I'm here, helping others learn their body.

Dodgers: Nice.

Bandana: But not a doctor-y way. Doctors have tunnel vision on science, which is an incomplete art. They cause problems, and track problems, so they cause most of the problems they track.

Dodgers: Nice.

Bandana: You're a great listener.

Dodgers: Nice.

Okay, he said thanks. I'm a comedy writer, give me some rope.

Intensely normal behavior: I have the same specialty shoe in an 11 and 11.5. I always put one on, rethink it, and dig up the other. Hopefully, just once. But there's a solid chance of me chasing my own tail for an embarassing amount of time.

You never know what something means to someone.

I bought a friend a fancy mechanical pencil I like, during an overcomplicated rant about specialty tools. Essentially, I argued that the entire class of product only existed for gifts, and no one making less than a Walton buys them for themselves.

He lit up."A pencil from a writer...this is like a sword."

I didn't really know what to say. Was it? I do actually use the product (unnamed brand--I've written enough real and fake ads to know what that plug's worth). But sword is a lot of pressure. And none of my hilarious rant seemed to have landed.

He carries it a lot. Hopefully not for iado.

New sensory experience: a human whistling like a firework. Maybe you've heard it. Maybe everyone in your family can do it. I was stunned.

"Planet Coffee" combines seven or so coffee shops I rotate to try to look normal. Which is, itself, insane. Planet Coffee IV has a bathroom sink with "Forein" carved into it. Likely a simple misspelling of "Foreign," given local politics and Planet Coffee's growing alcohol options. But I'm not sure, and my normal brain latched onto it. What I'm now certain of is that it's not normal to burst out of the bathroom and ask what everyone thinks "Forein" carved into the sink means.