Extra Evil - Like They Do In The Future
Today's Fortune: Hide the records.
Newsreel
The Daily Wire had three real readers.
The war machine's attention span wandered.
The Met Gala inspired another Bioshock.
Romania's prime minister isn't.
TKO checked wrestler's pockets for change.
The bubble will be safety tested. Keep buying.
A Photo
War Journal
Pigeons don't make much trouble. Try being a pigeon.
Gave up on my organization skills, and rebought Vol. 1 of Three Kingdoms. Still in love with the infinite character list, and Lu Bu's story going the only way his talent and personality disorder allowed. I'm sure there are no lessons for me, the perfect man.
There's an amusing *galaxy* between the book's values and mine regarding Liu Bei and Cao Cao (and presumably many modern and/or morally broken readers). The dissonance adds some nice flavor, given the overall efforts' propaganda quota.
On some issues, I'm forcibly remodeling my brain. Meeting the text where it's at, if you will. Specifically, I might make a sign that says "Pretending to turn down every promotion or compliment four times makes you cool, not the most annoying egoist in the world." I have enough feuds with people that exist.
A little problem follows me around art people. Not so much professionally, since collaborators are just happy I don't sleep and annoyed that I don't text. And not with the public, since crowds like you to be a little weird. Just in the streets, where there are no stakes. Naturally, I'm fixated on it.
I don't naturally *perform* creative life. Or think that phrase has much meaning. Pretending that every thought's about trendy art, the role of art in the world today (in those words), or the Eight Standardized Political Insights. It's like high school, without any underclassmen to impress.
Granted, connecting's tough. If four carpenters meet, bandsaws might come up. But it turns the conversation into something between a pop quiz and a cult meeting. Or, worse yet, a contest.
How's that angle play with people that date writers? Perfectly. No issues. I sail steady seas in a steady ocean.
A neighbor bikes around with a tire on his head. Considering Brooklyn hobbies, this might be the most photographed man outside of the UN. I might try to join the pile.
Overheard in Surprisingly Well DJ'd Books
Laptop: What'd he say?
iPhone: "You guys should break up."
Laptop: That's funny. Yeah, that's funny.
iPhone: Okay, here's what he really said. When you're trying to fix things with someone, and they do stuff that pisses you off...you can't criticize them. You criticize the things they do, and how they make you feel. But when you criticize them as a person you're done.
Laptop: Ohhhh. Okay, I think I get that.
iPhone: If you say you're trying to save a relationship, you have to do that. You can't do actions that are incompatible with that.
Laptop: That's nice.
iPhone: I don't know, they've been having the same marriage issues for like a year. I remember talking them in May...April.
iPhone: Every marriage reaches that point where they're like...fuck.
Laptop: Fuck.
Clicking. Tapping. Coughing.
iPhone: Lowkey, if they didn't have kids, I'd tell them to break up.
Laptop: They're two. I don't think they'd know if they split.
A Screenshot
The Present
- My new book saves your soul. [How to Dodge a Cannonball]
- Based on a particularly inane conversation. [Exclusive Evil]
- I had a great time grading the possessed with Lydia Bugg. [1900HOTDOG]
- The air fare is the expensive part. [Expensive Evil]
- My old book saves your body. [Everything Abridged]
The Past
My prior crossover article, with the inimitable Merritt.
The Future
Still pitching around. A bit more famine than feast lately, but at least that's still figurative. I think a little more coffee should change the trend. Or at least bend my perception of time until things *seem* to be happening faster.
Dead Sun Theory
Working on a big one.
Not Brought to You By
There's excess light and love around the American pothole these days. But an exception stands out.
You see this?
This will be avenged. I'll tell you when I'm done in Photoshop.
Creativity: C | Persuasion: D+ | Sanity: Fuck Off
Completionist note: As an ad in a moral, civilization-free vacuum, I'm of two minds about the phone number. On one hand, "scan this/call this/write here" calls-to-action have a long history of dung-scented failure. On the other hand, for the specific topic of grinding human endeavor into the dust, the interview offer has a whiff of format-bending cleverness. I hope everyone involved chokes.
One Sentence Reviews
Scott Pigrim Takes Off (Middle Chunk): Each episode's built around a spot like a Collision match. (4/5)
Local Man, Vol 1: I'm very, very late. (5/5)
Knee Injury: "You do it to yourself, you do." (1/5)
Splitsville: "That's the reason why it hurts." (2/5)
A Question
Signing Off
Thank you for reading Extra Evil, the newsletter with infinite patience. Share it eventually.
