Extra Evil - Reform.01
Be Evil.
Omens
Canada embraced pattern recognition.
Stocks rode high on pixie dust.
Hummers unlocked an Arctic trade route.
Germans got nostalgic.
Britain accused West Bank settlers of their stated goals.
Flock cameras found the exact point people notice surveillance.
Mirage
Announcements
Time to change tactics.
Smarter writers than me have noted how much Snow Crash we've inherited, without the spice. It's all megacorps, no katanas. But maybe we should change our approach. Make the katanas our responsibility.
Consider how many pothole programs begin with citizens filling in blacktop themselves, to make a statement. Let's do that with the holes in our cyberpunk experience. Reform starts local.
I propose a four point program.
- More commitment to new and outlandish slang. Yes, neologisms come out at a manic pace. But they fall out of fashion than many even learn them. And using one outside your social niche makes you sound like a mutant. Going forward, give each term, however inane, the college try. If cuck gets to live, than we should give everything a shot. Think grandparents talking about their keikaku.
- Subsidized raves. Everything from Cyberpunk 2077 to Batman Beyond makes it clear: bass is essential to proper cyberpunk living. Neon factories should be at least as well-supported as corn syrup, and taxed like your church. Many observers want more third spaces. Let's make that space shake.
- Guns4Blades exchanges. Burgers like to be armed, but the double-digit kill frenzies are inconvenient. I propose a new breed of gun trade-in program: give us your gun, and we'll give you a katana at twice its market price. In this meta, only the most cardio-addicted maniacs could build up newsworthy kill counts.
Granted, many of you would prefer disarmed maniacs. We can try credits toward sweet motorcycles instead, but my nose tells me it'll be less popular. And it'd make my next point a little more difficult. - More swordfights with tech CEOs. There aren't that many Cyberpunk plots, especially on tabletop. Things have a way of ending with an original character called Zark Muckerberg losing an iado draw. Or being eaten by their own creation, but companies aren't that into creating things at this point. Duels are more practical. Before killjoys express legal/moral concern, I'm not endorsing mass Mangione activity. It's a duel. They get a sword too. Trust me, they have the ego to play along.
We don't have to follow my program. But broadly, cyberpunk reform is overdue. Let's build a present worth dramatizing.
Assuming civilization doesn't get wet or radioactive, I'd give blood to play the games riffing on this decade now. Think of your Fallouts and Bioshocks, but its your grandkids mocking vertical video dances or electing reality TV nonces. It'll be beautiful. I hope the first few come out before I bite it.
Fellowship applications are odd. The workload of college applications, the turnaround of job applications, and the ROI of lottery tickets. We'll see where it goes.
I'm running on the fumes of fumes, but so is everyone else. I hope your fumes have a pleasant, fruity aroma. Perhaps an orange or strawberry.
I may start giving Polymarket bets bond ratings. They won't stop anyone from losing their shirt, but they'll let me mouth off on a random array of issues. And isn't that just as good?
I'm still doing a birthday Q&A post toward the end of the month. Comment with questions, and become immortal.
Entertainment
From the music video for Mastodon's "Snakes for Dinner."
Mastodon - Marrow Deep: "Monkeys paw, I want another great Mastodon record." (4/5)
Wanikani (Middle Teen Levels) - I have grown to seek the pain. (4.5/5)
Tae Kim Grammar (Home Stretch): The lack of practice anything is a choice, but I learned a great deal. (3.5/5)
Casino
Cannonballs remain survivable.
I eat at Goop Kitchen and live.
Another year's birthday ritual.
Nonsponsor
Rasta Sindy sent me down a rabbit hole, as you can imagine. I ran into an interesting crossover of sorts:
A campaign (there are a few variants) advertising carpets with Sindy dolls. The basic idea is "these carpets can survive your walking tornadoes of destruction," from a cuter angle.
I think that's a fun idea, the way I wrote it. But I'm torn on the real execution. There are a lot of children's activities with easy visual cues and much more destructive aftereffects than playing house with UK Barbie. It runs close to looking like you're inventing a problem. Which is an amusing problem, since they aren't. Playtime vs. property is one of the classic literary conflicts.
Granted: adding interest to what amounts to materials science is a win. And Sindy's less blackface-adjacent here.
Creativity: B | Persuasion: C+ | Sanity: B
Gasleak
Contents may vary.
Overheard in Bookstore Beanery:
Headset: I planned on getting a hotdog. I've wanted this hotdog, I've schemed on this hotdog. Then I went to a minor league baseball game, to get the hotdog, but I forgot the hotdog. I'll just have to go back. Unfinished business, you know?
Postcard
Be Evil.
